Second Session: No More Tears

I felt like a fraud!

Welcome back to my blog!  I hope you are enjoying these installments and they give you some insight into the hypnosis experience.

My first full week was what I consider a huge success.   I spent a lot of moments just in awe of the fact that I wasn’t craving sweets and junk food.  By the end of the week I was starting to be as much worried that it wouldn’t last as I was amazed that it was working!

I arrived for my second session, much more comfortable than I did last week; at least I knew what to expect this time (kind of).  We started off talking about how the week had gone and I told Karen that I was so very happy with the fact that I had no cravings, but really worried about when it would “wear off”.   I was struggling to make a connection between decades of eating so poorly with little to no control, and after 45 minutes of hypnosis (all of which I REMEMBERED) suddenly I’m like a different person, eating normally, not dying for brownies and donuts and candy.   It made no sense, as wonderful as the week had been.  

When she asked what I wanted to work on, I honestly didn’t even have an answer because I was feeling “cured”, even though I was nervous that it might not last.   I told her how incredibly hopeful I am feeling about my future.

I told her that I’ll be scheduling future sessions, probably in the Spring, to conquer my extreme and illogical phobia of snakes.  Gosh, I hate even typing that word!!  It makes my feet want to lift off the floor and everything in my body is so tense right now thinking about snakes.  Yeah, an extreme phobia.  She tried to get me to do some visualization and I tried to follow and go with it but after a few minutes I said “this isn’t working.  I’m trying to focus on the bright ball you’re describing and all I see is snakes slithering around it”.    HAHA, definitely not ready for that yet!   Back to the task at hand.

I can’t believe I said it out loud after just a week but I told her that if this goes the way I hope it will, with continued success, that I could see myself considering a career change in a year or two.  I absolutely LOVE helping people when I can, and will give what I can’t even afford to give in terms of time, money, and effort, to help someone that I see needs help.  Helping others in ways big and small is what gives me joy.  I prefer to help anonymously so nobody thinks I’m looking for kudos, but most important is making someone else feel better about life even if only for a short time.

Before I could get too carried away with future dreams (hey self, have a reality check, remember your hand was in the candy dish every 20 minutes 8 days ago!), we decided to focus this session on building a stronger foundation of healthy eating habits.

I remember much much less of the second session.  As soon as it ended, I could remember all of it.  No crying this time!   YAY!   🙂    As time goes on, I struggle to recall much of anything she said to me in this session.   I remember it was more suggestions that I would want to eat nutrient dense food and when I felt like I was beginning to get hungry but shouldn’t be because I had recently eaten, I would drink water instead because I would actually be thirsty.   Pretty basic, nothing exciting there.

When I woke up from hypnosis after the session, I felt like I must have been very deep in hypnosis.   Not groggy like post anesthesia, but felt like I had slept deeply for about an hour.  In reality, it was probably about 30 minutes in hypnosis and like I said, I was aware during it.   The details have faded over time.  Pretty cool stuff.

Okay, so how did the second week go?   I took the time to put together healthy lunches and snacks so I didn’t have to try to figure out what and where to get something decent in the middle of the day.   I continued to be in awe of how easy this change was to make.  I didn’t feel like I had MADE a change, only that “things” had changed.   I felt like a fraud saying “I’ve stopped eating junk”, because while it was true, I wasn’t actually putting any effort in, aside from showing up at Karen’s office for her to dig deep into my head.

Seemingly forever I have said “I probably need years of therapy” in reference to my inability to curb my junk food habit.   When I was joking like that, I secretly kind of believed it, and hadn’t been willing to even pursue it.  That’s messy business, talking about feelings and such.  My take on dealing with emotions:  as they said on an old tv episode one time, “Bury it.  Bury it with a shovel, then bury the shovel!”.

I was amazed over and over that I could trade the option of years of therapy for a session or two of hypnosis and get such immediate results.  How is this possible?   Seriously, this can’t last.  It’s too good to be true.  But for now, I’m going to take advantage of it and lose some weight while I don’t have to work so hard to eat well without the excess junk!

I had ordered a bunch of cookie dough from a fundraiser before I started hypnosis (before I had even scheduled it I think).  Thursday afternoon I picked up my cookie dough and decided my favorite just shouldn’t be in the house.   I didn’t crave them but I also wasn’t spending good money to fix myself just to tempt the sugar gluttons with cookies!   I went home and after dinner I baked the entire box of my favorites.  All 4 dozen cookies, all of them leaving my house the next morning.  My coworkers would eat them, I was sure of it!   My husband had 5 or 6 that night, I had 1 and it was plenty (how cool is that??).   I kept about 8 more at home and took the rest to work, where I had none.  Yeah!   The few remaining went home with a coworker for her kids to enjoy.   That night at home, I did have one cookie and one was quite enough.  That was the end of the cookies for me.  2 cookies in 2 days.  So exciting to think it was effortless to limit to just that; I simply didn’t desire more.   So dang cool!  I’m not sure I have ever experienced that in my adult life.  Ever.  It baffles and excites me all at the same time!

I was a little unsure how the weekend and next week (Thanksgiving week) would go, as I had time off from work until after Thanksgiving.  Would I resort to my old habits out of boredom?  Would I overstuff myself on Thanksgiving and forget how to eat normal again?   It was pretty new, and I felt like it wouldn’t be surprising to revert back to bad habits.  They say it takes 21-30 days to break a habit or create a new one.   It had been just 10 days since my first session as I headed into a week off from my routine and work.   A week that I would be home alone (well, me and the dog) for 3 days.  Unsupervised.  Could I do it?   Would it be difficult?  Would it, could it be, just as easy as the last week had been?

Stay tuned…in a few days I’ll be posting about my last (eek!!) session and how Thanksgiving went.  I want to get caught up to real time so these updates don’t rely on my memory.

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